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Thanks

By hissychick | June 17, 2008

Thank you everyone, for your lovely comments/emails.  You provided some much needed support and encouragement just when I needed it most.

I am happy to report that last night E did a whole lot better than usual, only waking at 9:30, followed by 1:30, resettling herself at 5 ish before waking at 6 for a feed, then settling back for a sleep until 7:30 when A got up. How brilliant is that?

I haven’t raised my voice at either of the kids in the last twenty four hours either. If anything was gained out of the low point that was the other night it is the fact that my appalling behaviour seems to have flicked on the patience switch in my brain.  Don’t get me wrong, shock and guilt are a large part of this, and I won’t set myself up for a fall by saying that I won’t ever yell again, because that’s just asking for trouble.  However I have had some time to reflect, and I realise now that I have been so volatile, not only because of exhaustion but because I spend so many of my waking hours in a permanet state of frustration.

Frustration at E for not sleeping.

Frustration at A for not listening and following through with simple requests so that we can get out the door to activities on time.

Frustration again at A for continuing to pick up her sister and snatch away her toys even though she is repeatedly told not to do this, and time outs have not helped one iota.

Frustration that my whole life seems to revolve around child care and the domestic chores that go along with said care.

Frustration that I always have a child with me and no time to myself.

Frustration that I have no identity outside of the home, no independent income at the moment.

I also realise that the only person who can do anything about this is me.  Instead of feeling helpless I’m going to take the time to address each of these issues one by one.  I’ve started by relaxing my expectations regarding A’s behaviour. Of course this isn’t to say she is getting away with murder, but I’ve reminded myself that she is only three and it is my job to model appropriate behaviours.  How can I expect her to be patient when I have been anything but of late?  And- shock! horror!- a calm and consistent approach to discipline leads to a much better behaved child. Fancy that.

I’ve also decided to go with the flow with E a little bit more. Who cares if I comfort feed her when she wakes in the night? If it means that everyone can get back to sleep more quickly and with minimal tears then so be it.  It’s not forever, and can and will be changed if moving her to her own room shortly doesn’t do t he trick.  Which it might. Fingers crossed.

OK that’s enough navel gazing for now.  Rome wasn’t built in a day and all that.   So to finish on a positive note:

I bid you all a fond adieu for now.

PS   Will get back to commenting on all of your blogs again shortly. JLow, I will get around to the post you tagged me for in the next week or so. Promise.

Topics: Silly mummy |

4 Responses to “Thanks”

  1. *nods* completely empathise with ALL of that - that is me, EXACTLY 12 months ago. And while I’m not 100% improved, I am not as constantly frustrated as I was. Bursts yes, but mostly OK.

    Posted by: Jenn on June 17th, 2008 at 9:23 am

  2. Eat the Birthday cake mixture. It will make you feel childishly good!

    Or make a batch of Brownies and tell no one else

    Posted by: Simone on June 17th, 2008 at 11:14 am

  3. Hey there!

    I am sure ToddlerDaddy’s playing his part too.

    Right?

    The man very probably deserves at least some credit too.

    The tag/post can wait! It’s only a for-fun thing.

    JLow’s last blog post..Don’t just backup your photos! Backup videos too!

    Posted by: JLow on June 18th, 2008 at 2:58 am

  4. So glad things are better.

    I comfort nurse Max all the time, except in the day now, as I am trying to reduce his nursing and hoping to reach full weaning. But in the night, when he has dreams and cries, etc. I just let him nurse so that we all sleep better too. Well, both boys still sleep with us so…

    Moomykin’s last blog post..School Time For All.

    Posted by: Moomykin on June 19th, 2008 at 3:34 pm

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