« Not a good idea | Home | Can’t blog, must tidy »
E the connoisseur (another fine parenting example)
By hissychick | April 7, 2008
E managed to consume a small quantity of Dettol waterless handwash just before bed last night. How she even managed to obtain the offending pump still amazes me because it involved real climbing skill. Of course it had absolutely nothing to do with a lapse in supervision while I was attending to A’s ablutions. I am a perfect parent after all.
Anyway.
Within three nanoseconds of realising what had occurred I was on the phone to the Poisons Information Centre. After establishing that E’s intake of said product was minimal, the kind and patient voice at the other end of the line advised me to observe E for half an hour or so, give her something to eat or drink and to ring back if there was a dramatic change in E’s behaviour. I was reassured that probably the worst that was going to happen was that E was going to have a tummy ache.
Somewhat relieved, I had a stern chat with E about the dangers of alcohol quite a number of years earlier than I had anticipated. Satisfied that she seemed to be duly chastised yet OK, I breastfed my happy little pixie and popped her into bed where she fell asleep not five minutes later.
An hour later, the fun and games began.
You all know the drill. Lots of crying, a gurgling tummy, multiple waking, feeding (by me), rocking and walking (by mr hissychick) until finally around 3 am little miss went to sleep after a feed and a dose of paracetamol.
Then mr hissy’s alarm went off at 6am.
Then I was joined by two happy awake children by 6:20 am.
And it hasn’t stopped since then. Crappy daysleep for E, A needing constant entertainment due to a rainy day, endless piles of washing, cleaning, cooking, shouting at A because I don’t have any energy or patience to deal with threenage rage* today and stressing about finances for me. The massive pile of crap that has taken over the house because we have just finished painting the spare bedroom in anticipation of a move for E isn’t helping either. I am one of those people who cannot relax when there is clutter about and while I have had to modify this stance thanks to the kids I am certain that I will develop a socially awkward nervous tic or seven if we don’t create some clean lines somewhere, anywhere soon.
Yes I am happy that E is OK now that she has passed her not so tasty snack treat from her system. But I NEED a break. Where is my sick leave? The conditions of employment for this SAHM gig sucks. Immensely.
Meh.
*Whoever said that the twos were terrible forgot to mention that they are nothing compared to three. Am terrified about what I have heard termed the f*cking fours…
Topics: Going bogue, Silly mummy, hissyfit, shitscared |
Yeah…I reckon bring a SAHM is the hardest job in the world. No clocking out, no sick leave, no leave for that matter and no retirement!
Prayerfully the JOY over rules it all especially when you see them graduate, get married and then have children of their own!
hahaha….then you can laugh the evil laugh and say “NOW IT IS YOUR TURN!” And grandma can spoil them rotten!
Ann’s last blog post..A Science Affair
Posted by: Ann on April 7th, 2008 at 9:41 amPersonally, I’m a little concerned that you’re supplying the alcohol for your children’s parties already. I guess you go by the reasoning it’s best they do it at home, hey?
Seriously though. I’m so glad E is perfectly OK after her cocktail, and hope she shies away from the stuff in future. She’s thoroughly modern eating Dettol hand gel rather than old fashioned soap isn’t she?!
And…I have to tell you I am deliberately ignoring your every mention on threenager rage. *wink*
xx Averil
Posted by: Averil on April 7th, 2008 at 10:55 pmI have to say, that while 4 has its moments, it has absolutely nothing on 3. It’s practically paradise over the fence. Or maybe the alcohol is finally working.
Whichever.
I also hear you on the sleep or lack thereof issue. This parenting stuff is a lot harder than it looked in the brochuuuuuure.
Jenn’s last blog post..Fantasy
Posted by: Jenn on April 8th, 2008 at 10:36 amAnn- I demand a new contract with better pay and conditions.
Averil- Glad I got in withthe alcohol talk because now I can leave the birds and the bees to mr hissychick mwhahahaha
Jenn- Don’t you be lulling me into a flase sense of security. And for someone who is sleep deprived you’ve just written an absloute gem of a post.
Posted by: hissychick on April 8th, 2008 at 11:27 amUhh! One of those Drama days!!
Glad to know E is ok. I’d have freaked out too!
Hope you get to catch up on some sleep.
But when E is about 2, it’ll be easier. 2 is not so far away. Then maybe you can get a sitter for a few hours a week and just go sit at a deli and rest, or sit in the park, or hide in a friend’s house. If she is pally enough, you might even request for some snooze time.
Posted by: Moomykin on April 10th, 2008 at 1:56 amMoomykin’s last blog post..She is More Romantic than He