« | Home | »

2 May 2004

By hissychick | May 2, 2004

CD 34 no hormonal alchemy in the boobs etc to let me know that AF is on her way. Unless my shitty mood counts. But then again, trying to stay all positive through this infertility journey simply wears thin at times. Stupid AF better turn up this week as it is time to get back on the rollercoaster. Oh joy…clomid to play havoc with my emotions, followed by waiting to see if my embies a) thaw and b) reach blastocyst stage. It’s going to do my head in. But not as much as having to do another stim cycle which I am sure will turn out to be the case. Because shit happens, the end…… I haven’t been posting on the boards of late, I just don’t feel I have many positive words of support to offer when I am in this type of headspace. You know, a bit bleak, a bit sarcastic, middle finger raised at the world to try and hide the fact that once again I am frightened by what’s ahead. Blah. I watched the report on the Sunday programme this morning about the “baby crisis”, you know, bad selfish career women delaying the whole baby gig and finding out that it gets a whole lot more difficult when they finally decide they want a little bundle of joy. I don’t know, women daring to actually want an education, what we should do is take ‘em out of school at 15 and pop them in the kitchen like the good old days. F*ck that. Not many words were mentioned about the blokes’ role in all of this. Why aren’t they committing to the idea of children at a youngish age? And are they aware that they too can have fertility problems? It’s one thing to take a group of twenty something women and give them the facts about the way fertility declines in your late twenties (something which is long overdue and should be emphasised to all women), but why aren’t they telling this stuff to men? To continue the cliche, ie blaming women for having babies/not having babies/fertility problems, next week’s installment is about IVF. What’s the bet the focus is on ‘older’ women and the challenges they face…. I am so pissed off. I am one of those dreadful university educated women with a decent career, yet I was going to be a mother at 26. I wanted that more than anything I have ever wanted in my life. But that was taken away from me along with a fallopian tube and now my DH and I are struggling with MF infertility and the heartbreak of IVF. Where is the Sunday programme about that? No….it’s far easier to blame women as a group for delaying motherhood rather than looking at the diversity of people who seek IVF treatment and realising that the decline in the number of babies in this country is not a black and white issue. I don’t know where I was going with that rant anymore. I am not even sure there was a cohesive line of thought in that one. Oh well, tough. It’s just one of those days…

Topics: Bitter TTC bitch, IVF/ICSI, Infertile thoughts, Preblog diary, TTC | No Comments »

Comments